Did you say BIN COLLECTION?

Well, it's only Monday and all ready there is news in Wrexham as regards the collection of Bins.


Wrexham Council plan changes to bin collections
Published date: 16 November 2009 | Published by: Staff reporter

Wrexham Council plan changes to bin collections - HAVE YOUR SAY

WREXHAM residents who fail to put their bins out by 7.30am may not have their rubbish collected at all under new council plans.

A report by chief environment officer John Bradbury to the authority’s executive board which meets tomorrow says the council gets numerous calls on a daily basis from residents who have not put their bins out as requested and ask for the crews to return to collect the waste.

http://www.leaderlive.co.uk/news/81540/wrexham-council-plan-changes-to-bin-collections-have-your-say.aspx


The week is certainly off to an explosive start with the township's favourite subject getting extensive coverage in the local rag. That's right, people will have to get up in the morning and put their bin outside their garden. That's big tough work. Or of course, they could do it the night before and not have to worry about it in the morning, but that's LOSER TALK! That involves common sense and forward thinking, see. Something totally at odds with the targeted reader of The Leader. Underneath the article there is a “Have Your Say” section, which while it lacks the sheer insanity, insularity and total bollocks of the Daily Wail or BBC HYS, it's still fun in it's own little way. Like a Baby Mussolini. See, it's rantings and ravings are fun now, but wait until it grows up.



“Posted by: Yachydda at 12:28 on 16 November 2009
What worries me is that there will be a small percentage of bins that older people or disabled people will find very hard to get out in the winter months especialy (sic) if its icy or there is snow on the ground...does this mean that they will have to endure the same treatment ?... I think Wrexham council has a point, but its of there own making.”


These bins are on wheels now you know. Gone are the archaic days of a Steel Container with your house number crudely painted on it in Whitewash, and some how a rotted hole in it from which a special brand of Rubbish Gravy would flow like the promises of love from a drunken 15 year old boy trying to let his girlfriend put his hand up her school jumper. No, we've plastic ones now. ON WHEELS. So if it's a bit icy, just roll it along, it'll probably help. And try not to slip and break your hip either, spilling your Werther's Originals and Roger Whittaker 78's from your tartan shopping trolley all over the hard, unforgiven icy floor. And there's warden assisted housing, which sounds ace and skill.



“Kirsty01979 at 13:31 on 16 November 2009
I think 7:30a.m. is an unreasonable time to have the bin out by. Perhaps if it was later people would have had a good chance to get them out instead of having to leave them out overnight or struggle with all the other tasks of a morning like getting ready for work or sorting the kids out for school etc. It would also mean that the bin wagons didn't have to be on the roads during peak morning traffic times and help to ease congestion.”



What's wrong with leaving the bloody thing out at night? I can't see your local “hoody” (ugh, I despise that blanketing) going “Oooooh, A Bin! I'll have that!”. But if the thought of your bin being just outside your garden is going to keep you up at night, fair enough. But wait, We should be allowed to put our bins out later! Well, fair enough then, We'll have the Binmen working a 12pm-8pm shift pattern! If you can't get your kids ready for school and have 40 seconds to roll the bin outside your garden, you shouldn't bloody have kids. This is probably one of the easiest methods of multitasking. In fact, it's not even really multitasking.

But I do have a solution. We should light our torches from the fire lit by a vagrant in Kirsty's bin and take to the streets of Wrexham. We can all march as one unit. The Fogies, The English, That miserable girl who works behind the counter in my local shop who's face would explode if she dared crack a smile as you buy your packet of Rizla, That weird bloke in Wetherspoons who pisses himself and sings Jesus Songs at you. We can all join as one and march, march to the Guildhall. We can march for transparency in Council affairs, we can march for equality, we can march for the saving of playing fields, we can march to save the Racecourse, but most importantly we can march so we don't have to get up as early to put the bins out!

Solidarity Comrades!

An Introduction to a Cultural Wasteland.

Hello there. How are you? You are probably wondering who *I* am. Well, I'm the seller of dreams, the taker of piss, and the drunken angry e-mailer of multi-national corporations with thinly veiled threats. I'm a student from the real European City of Culture, Wrexham. A place known for it's tolerant and sensible views on Bin collection, Immigration, Bin Collection, Bus Travel, Next Door's Lleyandii going into their Garden, Crime, The Youth Of Today, and Bin Collection.

If you've been to Wrexham, or from there, youknow all about the Armchair Politics in the pubs and the fact you can't get a Bus after 10:30 at night. But if you aren't I'll use this first entry to give you a bit of a flavour for the area. The best way to do that would be excerpts from the rag that makes Reuters jealous, The Evening Leader.




Well, I say Evening Leader, but it's not that anymore. The one thing it used to have going for it is that it wasn't published until the afternoon, meaning you could get the mornings news that day in written form, delivered by an urchin between the hours of 3pm and 5pm. However, that seemed like too good an idea, so a few weeks back they moved to a more normal newspaper model of publishing the night before for morning distribution, thus stripping it of it's only notable quality, and putting the publication on the same level as "Spot the Dog goes to Jonathan King's house" as regards a decent and important read. Only the Leader is possibly more offensive.

The best part of this bog read is the lettess page. Weighty, intelligent, well thought out opinions that make George Bernard-Shaw and Noam Chomsky look like a less eloquent hybrid between Ian Wright and Jade Goody's mam find their home on this page of visionary critiques of the Bin Collection Policy. For your reading pleasure, I shall bang some of them down here, so you can read them and bask in the glories of their high impact intelligentia.


WEDNESDAY NOVEMBER 11th 2009

UNBAGGED WASTE FOOD A HEALTH ISSUE

THE health and safety brigade has rapidly gained a Reputation for it's "nannying" interference.

Why is it then, that when we are instructed by the council to put waste food (unwrapped) into a wheelie bin. to be collected once a fortnight, the zealots of the H&S barely raise an eyebrow?

I'm no expert, but I do think that this disgusting practice constitutes a fairly serious health hazard! Surely, this problem presents the H&S with an ideal opportunity to do something really useful.

Allowing us to "bag" waste food would be a step in the right direction.

JB Dunbebin,
Address Supplied,
Wrexham


Well, a lot to think about there, eh? I'd like to point out first that Dunbebin is a great name. Can I just say that I was shocked that the first letter I saw in yesterdays paper when I decided to type one up for here was about The Bins. JB also made sure to keep to the rules for letter posting in the Leader. Our Good Friend Dunbebin made sure to shoehorn a reference to nannying in there, as well as disdain for Health and Safety. I imagine Dunbebin has a thrist for thrills and danger, and loves nothing more than diving off a 10 metre platform into a big pool of syringes, broken glass and signed pictures of Richard Littlejohn. In fact, all this letter lacks is the obligatory "You couldn't make it up!" closely followed by a "Political Correctness gone mad!".

However, I honestly can't see why having mixed food in a bin is that bad for health and safety, unless discarded Chips and Peach Melba Yoghurt has this majestic chemical reaction which results in some kind of super AIDS. I do like the word "bag" in inverted commas as well, like bag was a euphemism for something. Total and utter bollocks, perhaps. Basically, all I can glean from this letter is that Dunbebin didn't really have an issue and just wanted to have a bit of a moan about "The Nanny State" and "Health and Safety Nazis". "Health and Safety Nazis" being a phrase I've never understood, because Hitler killed a shitload of people, and Health and Safety being meant to stop people being dead. But I'm young, so according to Wrexham I'm too busy stealing off Old people while raping them with a drug laced knife.

You couldn't make it up.